When you know it's been too long..

or confessions of a haphazard housekeeper.  You know it's been too long since you last swept the kitchen floor when you reach for the broom and there is a spider web on it.  Like wise, you know it's been too long since you ironed when a guest wants to iron a dress and you can't find your iron.  The ironing board I found, just not the iron.  I was thinking today that when I retire in a few months I'll have a lot more time to be organized about my housekeeping.  Yeah! Like that'll happen.

most embarrassing moment

For some reason I was reminded today of an embarrassing moment which my children treated me to many years ago. First you need to know that I am not a heavy drinker.  I average about one glass of wine a month and maximum two beers a year.  After work one cold slushy winter afternoon I was shopping in a local drug store with my two, at that time, teenage children.  As we walked through the aisles of the store which were wet with tracked in snow I slipped and fell down.  Luckily I was wearing a heavy coat and I wasn't hurt at all but a concerned clerk expressed her sympathy.  I hadn't walked more than 10 steps when it happened again, same clerk, same sympathy.  And, would you believe it, it happened again? I had some very slippery shoes on.  Of course by this time my dear concerned children were laughing their heads off.  When we came to the check-out counter the same very solicitous (and probably fearful of being sued) clerk was behind the counter. After I assured her yet again that I was fine my son turned to me, deadpan, and said "Mom, I told you you shouldn't have had all those beers."  If looks could kill, he would not have lived to see manhood.
There's an old saying, "Revenge is a dish best served cold." My grandchildren are rapidly approaching their teens so I know some time, some how I will be avenged.

What 'cha doin'?

I work at a church which also houses a day school, and every once in a while I get trapped with a small child, usually when I in the restroom washing my hands or trying to pretend I'm not in one of the booths.  Invariably I get the question -"What 'cha doin'?"  Rather than give in to the temptation of grumping "What do you think I'm doing?" I've taken to giving answers like "I'm paddling my row boat to China." or "I'm in a rocket heading for the moon." or "I'm hopping up and down on one foot."  The reaction is always a long pause followed by "Nuh uh." usually with giggles.  Always leave 'em laughing.

I love to laugh

I've discovered a new favorite TV show "Last Comic Standing".  In the two episodes I've seen so far the comedy has been very witty and delivered in a wide variety of styles. One favorite joke was about the comedian's mom who is learning to text.  I so relate to that.  She didn't know what BTW stood for, thought it might stand for Booker T. Washington.  Another performer, after explaining at great length that he is not prejudiced (he happens to be white) said that the best use he's found for the "N" word is to use it as his bank password because he knows he will never blurt it out accidentally.  A good fun show but probably not for kids.

Guilty as charged

I admit that while I try not to show it, I do get irritated when two friends with carts stand chatting in a grocery store aisle and effectively blocking it so no one else can get through.  I've even been known to say "Excuse me." very nicely of course and I have even shifted a cart (but never one with a child in it) so I and my cart, and sometimes people behind me could get through.  So there I stood innocently searching the shelf for my brand of multi-vitamin when I heard a familiar voice say "Luci!"  It was a friend I haven't seen for a few weeks and we immediately launched into a swap of what have you been doing lately stories.  We must have stood their talking for a good five minutes before I heard a shuffling noise behind me and realized that someone was waiting to get through.  We moved out of her way of course and kept talking while trying to avoid blocking anyone else.  I do apologize to the stranger in question.  I will try to be more understanding..

A Memorial Day reflection

I was thinking today about my family's military history.  As far as I know none of my immediate ancestors died in battle but we do have a long military background.  A multi-great grandfather, Philip Von Steinmetz, came to the colonies before the Revolutionary War (legend says he escaped from Germany after he was arrested for killing the king's deer) and fought in the Revolutionary War.  My husband had a picture of a multi-great uncle in a Civil War uniform but I don't know any more about him.  My father-in-law fought in World War I.  He died years later of heart and lung problems aggravated by inhaling mustard gas in battle. My father served in World War II and was deployed to, of all places, Brazil.  My husband was in Korea after the Korean War in a time referred to as the Korean Occupation.  My older brother was in Viet Nam and came home with a smashed ankle but very much alive.  My younger brother was in the Air Force but happily not during a time of war. Now my daughter and son-in-law are both active military, and have been deployed, between them, six times.

I just realized, in all this long list, my daughter is the only woman.  Yea!! Beth!!

I proudly salute them all and thank God for many safe returns from deployments.

Bustin' my buttons, beaming with pride.

My son was the liturgist in church this morning.  We had a guest pastor so the liturgist had to read a large part of the service.  Now my intellectual side knows full well that my son is a grown man, 42 years old for goodness sake, and quite capable of leading a church service or anything else he puts his mind to.  But my motherly emotional side swelled with pride to see him up there doing an excellent job of taking us through the service.  It didn't hurt either taht after the service several friends told me what a good job he did.  That's my boy!!

Decoration Day

An interesting bit of history on TV this morning.  Memorial Day was first celebrated as a day to honor the memory of fallen Civil War soldiers and was called Decoration Day because it was a time to put flowers on the graves of those being remembered.  The holiday was gradually expanded to include those who died in the world wars, Korea, etc. and called Memorial Day.  I remember, when I was a child, hearing it referred to as Decoration Day but I don't think I ever really understood what that signified.  It's good to learn something new.

a long lazy weekend looms

Yea!!!, the weekend has come and I am so ready for it.  It's Memorial Day weekend which means Monday magically becomes a weekend day.  We will be experiencing that marvelous invention - the three-day weekend.  What a fine idea.  I'll celebrate by doing all or some or a few of the usual weekend chores but I'll do them more slowly with lots of breaks for relaxing. So I'm off to bed so I can wake up in the morning and start relaxing...

Let's here it for coordination!

I had the pleasure of watching my granddaughter in her baton/pompom recital this evening.  She performed with about 40 other girls but of course I was solely focused on her and she was amazing. I'm sure all of the other audience members were focused on their child / grandchild.  No one really saw if they were performing together or not, and if anything we notice was out of sinc with what our star was doing we knew the other child had goofed up.
Between the various performances their teacher explained how she began with the first year students.  I was with her through the first few basic baton moves thinking "I probably could have done that." But then she started adding dance steps to the basic arm and hand movements and I knew I would have been lost.  I guess I won't be taking up baton twirling any time soon (although, if I could get my hands on one of those flaming batons??? No, probably not a good idea.)

relaxing like a kitty cat

You can learn a lot from a cat, how to greet visitors - she was charming to my women's group, graciously moving around the table from guest to guest greeting each with a gentle wuffle.  Then she assumed a position high atop the roll top desk where she could keep an eye on the proceedings, making sure everyone was well supplied with refreshments.  She listened politely while everyone was exchanging opinions on the topic of the day and nodded at all the right places without ever interrupting.
But she's absolutely champion at relaxing after the event.  She has been stretched out on the couch since everyone left, barely twitching an ear or tail.  i am trying my best to emulate her.  Good kitty!

baking brownies

While I like to bake things from scratch, sometimes boxed is just better.  this evening, for example, I have just finished baking brownies for a ladies group which will be meeting at my house tomorrow afternoon.  I will also be serving healthier choices -  cheese and crackers and fruit - but I have a feeling they will eat some chocolate.  Will I?  Most likely. I know, I know, off that wagon again. The mix I used is Giradelli's Dark Chocolate brownie mix with chocolate chips. I have baked it before so I know it's good.  I baked a double batch just to make sure I don't run out. Humm, they're cool now.  I probably should do a taste test just to be sure about what I'm serving to guests.

mixed feelings

Ok, I'm a slow study but I am learning to text and I do see some advantages.  Like e-mail it's a quick way to send a brief message and you don't get caught in a prolonged phone conversation.  On the other hand, the telephone was invented so people could just talk to each other over vast distances - and it doesn't matter if you can spell.  Also I find I can speak many more words in a minute than I can text.  I need to work on improving the flexibility of my fingers - oh, good another exercise routine, just what I need.  At least there's no fear of me texting and driving.  It takes me too long to focus on those little bitty keys, and I have to be sitting still to focus at all.  Good to know the roads are safe from me.

"You're getting so tall."

My oldest grandchild, my grandson will be 13 next month.  We were together in church this morning when a friend of mine said to him "My goodness, you're getting so tall." and he is.  Suddenly the little boy is looking so much more like a young man.  Some weeks ago we were walking somewhere together across a parking lot and as we approached a curb he took my hand and it took me a minute to realize that he wasn't looking to me for help, he was offering to help me.  Roles are shifting, life moves on.  it will be fascinating to watch the next many years unfold.

Falling off the wagon

Way back at the beginning of lent I began doing without "heavy sugar" cookies, cake, donuts - things like that.  I have been very faithful about it for the last many weeks and I've lost a few pounds and my blood pressure is down, all good things.  But this weekend, with two of my grandchildren visiting, I have fallen off the wagon with a thump.  We had chocolate cake with supper last night, French toast with maple syrup for breakfast this morning and hot chocolate before bedtime tonight. Sob.  Ah well, tomorrow I will resume my careful ways, and on the plus side, my much more computer savvy than I am grandson found my cursor (mouse arrow) that I had somehow managed to accidentally disable so now I can write my blog more easily.  Both my grandson and granddaughter helped me discover lots of interesting features of my new phone, so a satisfying weekend all around.

hand held communication devices

Last night I participated in a talent show at my church sharing some humorous anecdotes about my grandchildren.  As I was preparing for the event I thought about the huge leaps in technology that have happened over the sixty years since I was the age of my grandchildren.  I jokingly said that, while all four of my grandchildren have I-pods, in my youth our idea of a nifty hand held communication device was a ball point pen.  People chuckled as I said that, but as it happens ball point pens, which I think were actually developed during WW2, were still something of a novelty.  We wrote with pencils in school but when we needed to write with ink we wrote with fountain pens that could be refilled by dipping them in a bottle of ink and flipping a little lever to suck the ink up into the pen.  Even niftier were the fountain pens that used cartridges filled with ink that you just popped into the barrel. As it happened I had a teacher in seventh and eighth grade (small school - two grades per classroom) that thought it was good practice for us to use dip pens and bottles of ink when we were practicing our penmanship.
Do people still practice penmanship?  Is that PC?  Should it be penpersonship?

Day two of the new phone saga

Well, now I have followed the steps to transfer (port) my old phone number to my new phone.  A process which they say can take form 72 hours to 7 days!  In the meantime I have this pricey little gizzwizz to play with.  I guess I'll check out the apps.  more later.

the beginning of my latest tech adventure

Well, my new phone arrived on my porch while I was at work today. That;s right, the phone that will move me out of the flip phone era and into texting.  Be still my heart. So far I have managed to get everything out of the wrappings, remove the plastic film on the screen, replace the original case with the snappy turquoise one I ordered, entered my wifi connection.  It seemed to want more so I pressed the help button and it's now loading what must be an 800 page book of instructions based on the time it's taking. More tomorrow.

Easy Banking Then and Now

I just transferred some money from my savings account to my checking account to pay a few bills; on line, took me less than two minutes - easy banking.  49 years ago I had just graduated from college and went into my small town local bank to borrow $300 to buy my first pair of contact lenses.  I was in my first year of teaching and earning the princely amount of $5,200 a year.  Contacts were fairly new and quite expensive.  I sat down with the bank manager to apply for the loan, had barely told him how much I needed and he said "Oh, you're Fred's daughter, right?"  I said yes I was, he said sign here, and I had the loan - easy banking in the good old days.

Happy Mother's Day to me

It has been a very satisfying Mother's Day.  I saw my daughter and grandson perform in the Bell Choir at church this morning. One of my granddaughters sang in the Children's Choir.  Everyone played and sang beautifully, the worship service was uplifting.  I have been gifted with flowers and family pictures and cards, all very special.  This evening we put together a quick pick up family supper (I really don't like to eat out on Mother's Day - too crowded) and enjoyed some fun conversation and reminiscing.  All in all an excellent day.  Thanks to my wonderful family!

But is it an excuse for murder?

For a long time I have suspected that the mega drug companies are inventing new diseases to sell us more drugs.  Illnesses with initials abound but I heard of a new disorder recently that I suspect was invented by a clever attorney.  The defense being offered in a case where a man admits murdering his girl friend is that the poor man suffers from IED, Intermittent Explosive Disorder.  Evidently, because the man had a rough childhood he now suffers from spells of uncontrollable rage. Awe, poor baby.  Somehow I think that the fact that has come out that he took over an hour to actually kill his victim will make this weird defensive disease a little less plausible.  One can only hope.

kicking and screaming

Well, it might just happen.  I may yet be dragged kicking and screaming into the 21st century.  For some years I've been experiencing phone envy as I watch my friends whip out their cell phones, send off rapid fire texts and show up to the minute pictures of their grandchildren.  In the meantime I clung to my old flip phone which does, after all, still make phone calls - when I turn it on.  I have used as my primary reason for resisting change the fact that my cell phone bill is $25 a month and I didn't want to pay more.  However, this evening my son showed me his new phone with which he can text, check e-mails, take selfies and so much more and all for the purchase price of the phone (under $200) and $10 a month service charge.  I think this could be the push I've been needing.

Am I getting nicer?

Another study reported on TV - people get nicer as they get older. Well, foo, I consider myself a fairly nice person now, at 69, but I must admit I was rather looking forward to become a grouchy old curmudgeon over the next 20 years or so.  I have visions of being the embarrassing old grandma at my grandchildren's weddings.  I plan to shout out things like "What did he say?"  "I can't hear your vows!" "That dress is too daring."  and the ever popular "That's not how we did it in my day."
And just think what I could do at graduations.  Hmmm, get nicer or have fun?  Decisions, decisions.
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enjoying a sick day

Do you remember the fun of a sick day when you were a child?  Not a seriously ill day but a day when you weren't really well enough to go to school; when it was ok to lie on the couch all day napping and watching day time TV (at least until your sibling brought your homework home)?  Well today I got to enjoy the feeling vicariously.  I stayed at home with my granddaughter who was too sick to go to school and we had a very pleasant low keyed day.  Since I was still getting over a weekend bout of evident food poisoning I was only too happy to spend a day relaxing.  I am happy to report that we are both nicely recuperated now.

old mice, young blood

Another fascinating study.  I'm simplifying here but basically old mice injected with blood from young mice regained their strength and vitality.  Humm..maybe those vampires know something. After a very busy weekend I feel like I could use an infusion of young blood.  They said studies on people could begin within five years.  Where do I sign up?

Rascally Calumny

You have to love a phrase like "rascally calumny".  I saw the play Misalliance by George Bernard Shaw this evening.  It was put on by First Presbyterian Theater and it was very well done. Talk about disfunctional families and quirky takes on political situations!  The story, set in 1909 England, takes place in a very well to do middle class household and pokes fun at everything from women's rights to parent-child differences and snobbery of all stripes.  Great fun!