Adding to the list

Yesterday I wrote about things I never plan to do, including Goat Yoga.  Today I am adding two more things to the list.  These are both based on recently heard news reports.  First of all, I will never raise chickens, free range or otherwise, in my back yard, or on my balcony for that matter. Once chickens get to be a week old they are not cute, fluffy little chicks any more. Having watched my parents raise chickens (1500 at a time) I know whereof I speak.  Secondly, I do not plan to take up Ax Throwing.  There are actually two places in Fort Wayne now where you can take Ax Throwing lessons.  All I need to do is to think back to my attempt to throw a boomerang during my recent trip to Australia.  My boomerang did not fly up and around and gracefully return to me.  Instead, it landed with a tired little thud only about 20 feet from me.  Therefore, I have an experienced based fear that if I tried to throw an ax at a target somewhere across the room i would be much more likely to end up flinging it in the path of another participant.  It would be just too embarassing to injure someone else or chop off my own foot.  In case you're wondering what I will do with all my free time, never fear, I plan to do safe things like read a good book or write this silly blog.